Monday, May 9, 2011

about more

After writing all that down last night, I wanted to write more today, but these are all gonna be from Russia.

Remember when I caught your eye
You gave me rainbows and butterflies
We did enjoy a happiness

That's MSTRKRFT's "Heartbreaker" the first 3 lines cause the rest is not about what I am gonna write about.

Remember when I used to watch you in class, you'd run around with the boys and I thought you were scary. When we ended up talking to each other at the stop and became really good friends. The times I used to come over to your house before classes and we would pretend to be something else. The times at night you did ballet and I laughed so much. When we fought over the recorder trying to sing and imagining to be famous one day. When we sent each other letters with drawings of our wedding dresses. When we decided to meditate together from opposite sides of the universe. When you sent me a crumbled up incense stick. When we walked around for hours drinking Schweppes. When we spent all summer painting the backdrop for our play. When we changed clothes on my birthday and took pictures. When we didn't talk to each other the whole day but still spent it together. When we used to catch frogs. When we sat on your balcony at night. When you were self-conscious all summer. When I came to visit you in the hospital one time. The times we were obsessed with one brand of chewing gum. When I forgot your birthday and you were so furious. I could go on for days.

Different people. Remember when we played with little toys all night and stole champaign. When you came to my birthday and it ended up being awkward. When my grandpa thought you were awesome. When we played king of the hill at night in the snow. The time we climbed up on the scaffolding. When we had to be friends because she was not there. When you commented on my zipper. When I was really annoyed but went with you anyway. When those grannies were giving us a weird look. When I was really sick and you ate a lemon. When I texted you instead of her and it was awkward.

SHE SHOULD HAVE DIED WHEN SHE WAS BORN.

Lately my posts have been dark and strange, and someone told me they sound like suicide notes. THEY ARE NOT. Pfft. I just like being dark once in a while.

Remember when I used to dance with you but always wanted to dance with your friend. When you used to hug me every day when I came to stand in line. When we sat in the bushes one time and you escaped through the gate, we all thought you were so daring. When I hated you because your face was always so dirty. When your Dad showed up already half-drunk. When I lost my shoe and you helped me out. When we read my book together. When I didn't win the competition but you did.




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