Brooks Salzwedel.

Pretty cool, no?

Banksy

Ever heard of "Overself"? I am interested. Dreams. I am in a weird mood today.

so what's the use between death and glory?

Happy endings, no they never bored me
Happy endings, they still don't bore me.

Babyshambles =^.^=
It's that kind of day. I'm just gonna show some cool pics cause it's that kind of day. Ahhlalalalaa...

Pete is such a sweetheart!!

I really really want a black German shepherd puppy.... I know they grow into big dogs. That's what I want.. to watch my puppy grow into a large ferocious beast that would actually be a total sweetheart. Black German shepherds are so fucking beautiful. Could you imagine, my black cat Panther and then a black dog.. I'm such a witch!!! Someone suggested I should just wear all black and make it my "thing" haha... maybe I will do that. But I like wearing colorful stripes too... anyways.

Aren't they the most beautiful creatures? I don't think my cat would like it very much if she knew that I wanted a black puppy. She would probably enslave him and dominate him haha... she is such a bitch when it comes to attention. She wants me all to herself!

Some albino animals are amazing.

These are amazing:

I just watched Enter the Void recently... WOOOWW

Watched Animatrix recently again... My favorite part is the haunted house and the lost cat :3

Finally, how can we forget about the Mighty Boosh???

That last one was the best! Haha... okay I'm off to clean the house. for real.

been feelin the gay lion vibez

Hello world! Feeling weird today. But that's nothing new. Been listening to the yeah yeah yeahs all day instead of doing work/ going to work. A lot of things just put me in a very weird mood.


I was reading about domestic violence/relationship abuse articles all morning, not sure why. Feeling a major inspiration for a new script coming up. So me and Alex have been having this thing about gay lions for a few days... Not sure how it started. I think it was the weird cat/owl/alien thing he drew on my arm, and then a few days later we googled it and got this, inverted color and sides:

For some reason Alex called it gay lions. And now the whole gay lions vibe is going around my head.

I decided to listen to last.fm for like the first time in years. Me and friends used last.fm waaaay before anyone knew about it, before facebook or something like that. But anyway, so I typed in Yeah Yeah Yeahs radio and.... they played "Pin" and now playing Crystal Castles "Celestica". HOW are CC related musically to YYYs?? It doesn't make any sense.

But more than anything, I've been obsessing over Yeah Yeah Yeahs' "Gold Lion" song.

Outside, Inside,
This is the moon without a tide,
We'll build a fire in your eyes,
We'll build a fire when the cover's getting brighter,
Cold desire makes the moon without a tide

Last night everyone was feeling very weird. I've been having really vivid dreams that are so much like reality but strangely inverted/surrealistic/as if reality took some acid and munched on a few shrooms too. Like my cats are present in every dream. One time I dreamt Enzo and Panther had kitties (which is impossible in real life cause they're fixed) and there were two black kittens and two ginger kittens. Again, impossible in real life because they are both black cats, how could they possibly make ginger kitties?

Last night we had a sleepover of sorts because it was a scary night to be alone. I read a huge encyclopedia about the universe and it was beautiful and possibly was the reason for my strange mood today. But everything has been strange. Last night everyone was feeling strange, or at least two people. The moon was so bright and left a beautiful illumination on the clouds near to it, with an orange glow on the very edges. It was scary, everything was empty. It was like everyone disappeared from the world. And everyone that was left was a character from a post-apocalyptic novel, scavenging for food and resources, like that stupid movie Mad Max II. Listening to the same song over and over is also not helping. What if the world really is going to end really soon, in my lifetime? Would I survive, and the others that I know, or would I be left all alone in the debris of corpses and death? Or would someone else I know be left alone in the emotional delusion and I will be safely dead?

  

gummo and stuff

Enzo just crawled into a box again, he is so funny. Sometimes he is such a kitten still, he crawled on my lap today and started hypnotizing me with his super lovey eyes and purring. When panther does it it's more elegant and mature, but he is such a little kitten still.

That's not what I wanted to write about today.

I just watched Gummo for the first time. Well, I have to say it was just my kind of movie.

I think there are separate levels on which I enjoyed Gummo. First of all, everything desolate and pointless, life-is-meaningless depressing waste of space, boredom and apathy: those kind of themes are my obsessions. What's the point of making a film about happiness, when it's pretty obvious that life is completely as dull and pathetic as the lives of the feral cats that the boys hunt in Gummo.

Secondly, Solomon is the perfect anti-hero. He definitely doesn't look like any other kid in the world.

I like how every character in this movie looks very bizarre physically. The sisters have bleached hair and eye brows, and then this other character shaves her eyebrows off. It instantly made me want to shave mine off, to look like an alien. I might do it in the summer just for the hell of it.

I love the bunny boy. Actually, when I was downloading Gummo I came across "Bunny Gamer" by Xiu Xiu and the bunny boy should always have Bunny Gamer playing as the soundtrack to his persona.

Gummo is like the ultimate white trash portrayal and as you may know, I am completely fascinated and obsessed with the idea of white trash and anything remotely related to it. I find it the best cure for the dullness of the real world- to fight with more dullness of the real world I guess? I don't know.

I didn't even like the movie Kids, I see why it has a cult following but it just wasn't my thing, I think it was too structured for me, or maybe the themes were too obviously stated, or I don't know... I like the lack of plots and linear structure. I like movies that have no linear structure and that could have been any days in the lives of those characters. In a way Kids is like that, but I feel like it has a  definite beginning and end, whereas Gummo or Ken Park don't.

Also watched The Holy Mountain recently.

I really liked the first half of the film, and the ending. I loved the story of "Jesus", everything from the toad circus to how he got drunk and they made statues from him, and how he carried Jesus around and ate its face. How he met the Alchemist and did a shit in a glass jar and they made gold out of it, and how the other characters were introduced. Once they started searching/going to the mountain my interest just fell completely. I do love the ending though, that was genius. But the main plot line just wasn't that good.. I mean if the guy can film all these beautiful scenes about nothing, why can't he have done the same with the plot? It just blends in visually and after all that eye-candy in the beginning, the actual plot is dull. I still really enjoyed it, but I would rather have no actual plot to search for the mountain, just more randomness and strangeness.

What else has been going on? I am obsessing over Xiu Xiu and wrote a script for two songs for a video project.

It's been pretty warm out recently so I am wearing shorts.

I pretended to play the cello at Alex's house last night.

Almond vegan cheese is so incredibly tasty!

I made a webcam video about strange things and I remember I was telling someone about it last night, but totally forgot who. Oh wellsz.

Oh saw this guy play last night at the former BabeRage house. Amazing I was so impressed. And of course, Teaadora was as beautiful and lovely and amazing as ever.

IM GONNA F*** YOUR FACE UP

cuz its ugly like YO sistAH

Ah Hadouken always always put me in the mood for raving.

Me Valik and Sasha are in this photo :D Oh my, how I miss Heartbeats nights, especially that one time there were no people left in the club and the DJs just played whatever we wanted to dance to, it was amazing, the whole club to ourselves! Missing Damian and the Bulgarian and even Dmitry who once just offered us a bottle of lemon vodka and we politely declined.

I feel like Heartbeats was something to call home, my scene with all the crazy electro kids trying to dance like those crazy Frenchies with their Tecktonik and as you can see, the multi-colored skinny jeans and shirts and super awesome sneakers were in fashion back in 2006-2007, waaaaay before they reached America. Yep, even in Prague people knew what's up. So many good nights, so many good memories. I heard dMIT.RY still DJs but don't know anything about Damian or anyone else. Oh gosh I just remembered the "Rabbit". I had a dream once and she was in it.

Enough reminiscing for now I guess. I might try and see if dMIT.RY is DJing in Prague this summer when I'm there, hopefully in for a good night?

Enzo the cat is just chillin in the box all evening, what a strange cat. Panther keeps walking past and giving him "the look" that basically says "you're such an idiot, why in the world do I have to live with you?? ah I guess it can't be helped. Idiot." I have a picture of him sitting in my bag but I can't transfer photos from my phone (it's ancient) but it was epic. So epic.

Listening to "Jeffer" by Boys Noize... Such an amazing song, I remember I used to be completely obsessed with it when the album came out. I still am, but less now I guess cause I've moved on a bit. Still, Boys Noize will never eveeeer die in my heart.

about more

After writing all that down last night, I wanted to write more today, but these are all gonna be from Russia.

Remember when I caught your eye
You gave me rainbows and butterflies
We did enjoy a happiness

That's MSTRKRFT's "Heartbreaker" the first 3 lines cause the rest is not about what I am gonna write about.

Remember when I used to watch you in class, you'd run around with the boys and I thought you were scary. When we ended up talking to each other at the stop and became really good friends. The times I used to come over to your house before classes and we would pretend to be something else. The times at night you did ballet and I laughed so much. When we fought over the recorder trying to sing and imagining to be famous one day. When we sent each other letters with drawings of our wedding dresses. When we decided to meditate together from opposite sides of the universe. When you sent me a crumbled up incense stick. When we walked around for hours drinking Schweppes. When we spent all summer painting the backdrop for our play. When we changed clothes on my birthday and took pictures. When we didn't talk to each other the whole day but still spent it together. When we used to catch frogs. When we sat on your balcony at night. When you were self-conscious all summer. When I came to visit you in the hospital one time. The times we were obsessed with one brand of chewing gum. When I forgot your birthday and you were so furious. I could go on for days.

Different people. Remember when we played with little toys all night and stole champaign. When you came to my birthday and it ended up being awkward. When my grandpa thought you were awesome. When we played king of the hill at night in the snow. The time we climbed up on the scaffolding. When we had to be friends because she was not there. When you commented on my zipper. When I was really annoyed but went with you anyway. When those grannies were giving us a weird look. When I was really sick and you ate a lemon. When I texted you instead of her and it was awkward.

SHE SHOULD HAVE DIED WHEN SHE WAS BORN.

Lately my posts have been dark and strange, and someone told me they sound like suicide notes. THEY ARE NOT. Pfft. I just like being dark once in a while.

Remember when I used to dance with you but always wanted to dance with your friend. When you used to hug me every day when I came to stand in line. When we sat in the bushes one time and you escaped through the gate, we all thought you were so daring. When I hated you because your face was always so dirty. When your Dad showed up already half-drunk. When I lost my shoe and you helped me out. When we read my book together. When I didn't win the competition but you did.