london is my bff

"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." Sylvia Plath.
Today I sit in bed, for the first time in over a week, and stare at my computer screen. I realized I haven't been reflective enough this past summer, I haven't done a lot of things.
"Let's all die,
Let's die my way" - Hadouken.
I've never been into quotes, but today these two are circulating in my mind, so I just have to.

I never thought that settling in a different city could be so easy. Then again I never thought I would hate living in one place for more than a couple of years. I am surprised I am not sick of Bloomington, Illinois state, IWU, America. It's been two years there, with short breaks here and there. I sit in London and I still miss it, maybe it was those breaks that prevented me from getting sick of it. Having said that, I am ready to move on and go to grad school, or get a job, or do something else. I am optimistic about IWU, but at the same time thinking that when I come back from London, I will still have 1.5 years left there makes me kind of uncertain. Is this my future then? Never staying in one place, I have no home.. all that crap?

Or maybe I just want to explore everything in the world, and 2 years for one place is enough? I don't know, it's certainly confusing. I feel like I will never settle anywhere, because even when I move away from a place, and visit it later, it doesn't excite me at all. I've visited Prague many times after I left to America, and yet every time I'm in Prague I hate it just the same... I am a little bit disappointed that I am only staying in London for 3 months. I would like to stay here for two semesters, but I haven't even started classes yet! Maybe I'm just overly excited and I shouldn't be because I get excited about everything too easily.

We went to Wales last week. It was definitely exciting, refreshingly beautiful. I loved the horses, the sheep, they made me happy, maybe just the fact that they're still alive and not eaten/abused by humans. Yeah, I'm an animal activist so what? Someone has to be. Maybe I am a walking stereotype, but at least people like me DO make SOME difference to the amount of animals killed for human pleasure every year, so at least that. But I also loved other things in Wales. I liked how people are so calm. I absolutely loved the sea, but then again I am crazy about water, and as someone once said, I'm a mermaid. Here's a picture:

Picture taken by Chris Terrell.

I liked other things. How the pubs/bars/clubs were straight out of the 90s or early 2000s, how our homestay's family cat was suuuuuper fat and cute. The boats, the water (again)... yeah, I liked everything about it.

Now as for London... I don't even know where to begin! I love the tube, the buses, the long walks, the architecture, the people, the hipsters and others similar, the million other nationalities, "mind the gap", musicians in tube stations... Well, I realized this summer I really like the subway/metro/tube/underground .. it's called different in every country. The point is, I love it! I'm kind of obsessed with it even. I don't know why, but in every city I travel to, I always want to go on the trains and figure it out, and it's always my favorite type of transport, and I love everything about it. Here in London I love how the ceilings are low, how changing from one line to another is kind of like walking through a labyrinth sometimes. I like the musicians (as I already mentioned), the posters, the brick walls, the crowds, the trains themselves, the seats, the announcing lady... basically, I'm completely obsessed. Maybe one of those days I will just go on the tube, spend hours just travelling on the tube, people watching, maybe do some sketches as well.

I like everyone in my group (visiting students), I like the things we do, I like my college (Goldsmiths) because it's awesome and such. I can't wait to start working in my studio, I can't wait to draw and do artsy stuff, I can't wait to just ... do everything. I want to do music videos, and just film stuff in general, I want to be on the radio, I want to go to Tate Britain and pray in front of Turner and Gainsborough.